A New Perspective On Tragedy

"Storms make trees take deeper roots." - Dolly Parton

This week I had a classic homework assignment. The old: "Interview an adult on nine eleven," assignment. My initial thought was, I think I could tell the entire story of my mom's 9/11 and my dad's 9/11 as well as they can. I'd seriously done that interview like fifty times. So what did I do? I said to myself, "Self. I am not going to do that again." So I didn't. Instead, I sent a last-minute email to my grandmother who lives in a cornfield in Indianapolis wondering if she could share some thoughts. I tell you people, sometimes the most amazing things happen at the most unlikely times. 

I only gave her two hours to answer me, and their wifi is sketchy so it was basically a coin toss as to whether I would even hear from her. But nevertheless I got an email, and I was amazed by what she imparted to me, which is this, a new view of tragedies that happen in our lives. 

She sent me the usual 9/11 interview stuff: her youngest son (at the time a freshman or sophomore in high school, not sure) had gone off to school, she was getting ready for a doctor's appointment, happened to turn on the news... the story. And she talked about feeling scared and terrified that there were people in the world who would kill thousands for the sake of killing other people. 

But these are these little paragraphs, spread throughout are the ones that got me: 

"Some churches had special services to pray for all the tragedies and to pray for peace and to pray for our country. Others prayed at home and asked God to direct and protect."

"The country really drew together. They became united like I’ve never seen before. Many turned to prayer; sporting events were canceled out of respect."

" I loved the new patriotism that came out of the attacks. And I loved the new seriousness towards God and country. I’m sad this has not stayed with the country now. So much disagreement and bickering, instead of thankfulness for our free country. It seems many have forgotten about that time that was so devastating and horrible, yet brought our country together. We were so united."

That's the kind of wisdom you don't get from your annual 9/11 interview with mom. Most of the people getting this email lived through this tragedy and therefore don't find what I'm observing here as amazing as I find it. But I, not being alive at the time of the attacks, never really knew these things and every year when we remember these attacks and the people that lost their lives I'm learning new things from the perspectives of people who did. 

Hear me out: In what I'm about to say, I'm not trying to downplay the tragedy of this or support anything that happened. What happened was disgraceful and embarrassing and the people that went into those fires with such small chances to do anything just with the glimmer of hope of saving a life - that is heroism personified. I know that there are people getting this ema who have either lost someone close to them or know someone who did during this attack or during other senseless acts of violence or in protecting this amazing country. I will NEVER condone these attacks, and I am supportive and continually praying for those whose lives have been ripped apart because of this terrible, dark day in our nation's history. 

But despite the extent of the tragedy good absolutely came from it! As I started to think about people going through terrible things, I realized that it's not just 9/11 that brought people together in ways never seen before. It's tragedies in general. A neighbor lost a loved one recently and my mom went over and brought her a meal and they talked for hours. A great example is at our high school, the cross country coach, a beloved man who was appreciated a lot by his runners for more than just putting on a team on the course had a heart attack and passed DURING a practice. The next day the school was drawn together, solemnly quiet and respect like I've never seen out of people in that age group. I remember a family in elementary school had their house burn down and we all got together and donated supplies for them in whatever way we could and the school was really close and supportive of each other during that time.

What my grandmother said absolutely hit the nail on the head. Bad things are happening all around us all the time, terrible things that can only be the result of living in a sin-cursed world, and so I have to be very careful with what I say here, but honestly for the most part, here in America, we don't know what tragedy is. To be hungry? To fight for your next meal, killed for your religion in brutal ways that I can't even put in this email and have it rated PG? Unthinkable. Bad things happen. 9/11 happened, Peral Harbor happened, the Boston Marathon happened, Oklahoma City happened the list goes on and on, and there are personal things on top of that, maybe not related to violence, but big and small that really hurt, but despite all of this, most of us do not go to work in the morning with a serious fear that it could be our last day on earth. Here in America, the fact is, we don't know tragedy.

Tragedy brings people together, it unites them. When we are the most needy, desperate for someone to hear us and help us we will find someone, and when people are feeling that all over, unity is inevitable and there is tremendous hope in that and there is no petty bickering over stupid things, there are no negative thoughts, none of that can exist because the sorrow is so great. And then the sorrow passes and we forget what that is like, we forget so easily what it was to be in the pit of despair and how grateful we ought to be for all that God has given us. In some ways, we could do with a little more tragedy because tragedy brings us together. 

My pastor Doug from when we lived in Avon, Indiana (he was amazing, we miss him so much! Harvest Indy West if you're in the area and looking for an awesome, Bible-believing church.) had a phrase for our way of thinking in America. "We are a people that is far too MYopic and MEopic," he would say. Me and my. That is the song that I hear all day long. What tragedy does is it makes us forget about ourselves and think about the whole. This is absolutely the story in impoverished countries daily. We got a letter from the child we support in Africa, (Ethiopia I believe) he was still pretty little so it was a fill in the blank kind of thing and one was "favorite chore." Do you know what he put? Walking to the well and getting water for his family. I had chill bumps. Even though they don't know when their next meal is coming, and dehydration is a real threat, they can join together and praise the Lord.  Oh, how we need that here. 

So what do you do with that? Am I suggesting that you go into the world and make tragedy for yourself so that you can feel united? Far be it from me. In my small experience in life, I believe tragedy will find you. What I do want to say is that in all of the tragedy that is just a fact in this world, take heart. 

- Tragedies bring us together and unite us, and shift our focus from rugged individualism to being about a body of people. 

- Tragedies bring perspective to our lives and help us learn to be grateful in ways that nothing else can. 

These two facts show that enormous good can come out of tragedy in that tragedies mold us and make us stronger. This is all great advice until it is happening to you. Friends let me say, if you are in the heat of a tragedy, something horrific happening to you, know that I care, and I am here and my thoughts and prayers go out to you. More importantly, know that the God who made the universe cares and he is at work. He is always at work and he can use anything. However bad it may feel, know that the one who does not make mistakes is driving the ship. Know that tragedies, however hard they may be, whether hundred story buildings collapsing, loss of a loved one by a drunk driver, or just moving to a new town, whatever it is, God is working and good WILL come out of it. Tragedies bring us together, they make us grateful and they make us stronger. In the midst of the very worst, hear me friends: there is hope. Tragedies will happen, are happening, and it hurts. Yet amid the worst of it, look for the hope and find the good.